201301511 Yukyung Bang
Her fingers were dancing on a guitar. On each dance move, I could hear a beautiful note of the acoustic guitar she was playing. If she was not playing a guitar, she couldn't have caught my eyes. She was sitting on a wooden bench at a Ttukseom Han River Park. She was crossing her legs on which she placed her guitar. For about ten minutes since I had started to watch her, she didn't stop playing even for a second. Her eyes were closed and her shoulder-length black hair flew in a gentle breeze. She looked perfectly normal. She was wearing blue jeans, shirt with blue stripes, and a pair of black sneakers. Nothing special. She didn't look like a "musician" or an "artist" kind of a woman that I would normally picture in my head. But the fact that she looked so usual made her look special. Even though she didn't sing as I hoped, but sometimes she hummed to herself along with the melodies, one of them I recognized as "Hotel California" by the Eagles. After two or more songs, she asked her friend who was sitting right next to her, "Any request?" Although her friend said in such a small voice that I couldn't hear it, I couldn't help noticing her answer. She placed her fingers on the guitar once more and started to play one of my all time favorites and my theme song, "The Lazy Song" by Bruno Mars.
I like the way you describe. It was impressive because I could guess the whole atmosphere of the place(Han River Park) while you were just writing about the observation and description about the woman playing guitar and her appearance. I enjoyed the peacefulness through your writing and it made my mind peaceful either.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile, the information expressing her normal or general appearance seems to be repeated.
"If she was not playing a guitar, she couldn't have caught my eyes."
"She looked perfectly normal."
"the fact that she looked so usual"
"Nothing special."
I think you can emphasize her normality based on her appearance and behavior using one or two sentences above. Not by telling she was normal but by showing her normality as you wrote like
"She didn't look like a "musician" or an "artist" kind of a woman"
"She was wearing blue jeans, shirt with blue stripes, and a pair of black sneakers."
201203589 Choi, Won-joon
Maybe she read your mind. Lazy Song and Hotel California are both one of my favorite songs especially Hotel California, one of my all time billboard chart. I wish I would be there too.
ReplyDeleteone suggestion: It would be much vivid if there are more detailed feeling when you heard those songs.
Changyu Kang